Manasa took a long walk yesterday to his Mongolian class and took some pictures along the way, thought I'd share a few.

Chocolate Cravings

It is 3pm and as I wander around the kitchen looking for a quick snack I realize I already know where I am headed....to the chocolate. Now to some that may not be so bad...but for me I am to avoid chocolate. I pick up the chocolate cake neatly packaged and after I eat it I begin to think...I KNOW that eating this is not healthy for me. Problems with the gallbladder means I am to avoid chocolate AND processed food, both found in the chocolate cake now in my belly.

And it reminds me of the verses in Romans 7 where Paul talks about doing what he does NOT want to do, and not having the will to do what he knows he should do. Its true...I do NOT want the chocolate cake, yet it's now what I crave. Keep in mind that Manasa and I do not typically buy sweets for two reasons: one health wise but the major reason is the tight budget we are on. We may only have thirty dollars for food to last us two weeks so our priority goes to vegetables, meat, milk and bread. However we were given a nice care package when I was sick including yogurt and fruits (now gone) but the chocolate cakes stayed in the back for a while. I am feeling better this week and just thought I'd try ONE....little did I know that now every time the stomach growls, its that ONE that I crave (not the yogurt, not the fruits, not the leftover vegetable salad).

That too reminds me of the power of sin...compromising once with the false notion that we have the will power in ourselves to not choose that option again. I'm hit with gratitude that Jesus left us with the power of the Holy Spirit yet saying "thank you" doesn't seem to be enough. Because as Paul says, by my sinful self I am not able to overcome my flesh, but only by power graciously shared with me by my God in heaven, who knows me better than I know myself. I know the chocolate cake will soon be gone...especially as I encourage my husband to finish them. Most likely my refrigerator or pantry will continue to be empty of sugary processed foods but the point is that EVEN IF they were full, the Holy Spirit can grant me the power to resist the temptation...because my own knowledge of it's negative effects is not enough :)

PS I'm in NO way passing judgement on people's eating habits; food is meant to be enjoyed...including chocolate in moderation ~

CHURCH

Missionary moment- staying up past midnight to have 'church' through an online live stream of Times Square Church. They have amazing worship and we appreciate the sermons that are biblical, educational, and always with a heart of compassion for the broken. We may not be able to go to a local church (there is only an english service once a month) to be filled but God provides other ways so we can in turn pour out into the local Mongolian churches.

Happy Sunday everyone!

Welcome Lyvia and Sofie

Today marks an important event - the birth of my twin nieces, Lyvia and Sofie.  How blessed our family is! The birth went well and big sister is being cared for by grandma as everyone prepares for the blessings to arrive home. It reminds me of the verse in Genesis:

Then God blessed them and said, "Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it. Reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, and all the animals that scurry along the ground." My sister didn't expect twins to run in our family, but God knew how much 'multiplying' He wanted to be done. In my opinion, there is no greater call in life than parenthood- increasing the Kingdom of God through discipling your own children. I won't get to meet the twins right away but am blessed to still be a part of the process, knowing my family is thinking of me and of course my prayers and praises being raised up across the ocean.  Looking forward to seeing if skype will work as the wonders of Internet being available in the hospitals in the USA is to my benefit! Praising God for health and His marvelous design of creation ~

Who are 'the least of these' ?

Henri Nouwen wrote "Compassion is not a bending toward the underprivileged from a privileged position; it is not reaching out from on high to those who are less fortunate below; it is not a gesture of sympathy or pity for those who fail to make it in the upward pull. On the contrary compassion means going directly to those people and places where suffering is most acute and building a home there" 

Two nights ago we heard a man snoring outside our apartment door. Typically we have an outside door that remains locked but this night it must have been left open and this older homeless man made his way inside to get out of the wind. Our hearts broke and as my husband wandered around the house brainstorming what we could give this man, I was thinking of our 'extras'....Maybe we didn't have a blanket to spare but we had an extra thick curtain that can offer warmth. I grabbed a small pillow from the couch but Manasa pulled out a bag with two extra full length pillows. He went out and offered the pillow and 'blanket' to the man who was grateful (and he returned them in the morning). As we went to bed we were still brainstorming how much more we could do. 

And I was convicted.... convicted because my heart still struggles with full abandon to 'giving'. I automatically think of my needs first, my survival....THEN sharing what I have with others. My heart is still full of compassion but my flesh still sneaks in. I lay there asking myself "Why didn't I take the blanket off my bed? My apartment is plenty warm without it. Why didn't I offer one of my two pillows that I sleep with?" And I turned to confess to my husband and to God and still battle that dilemma-- how do I take the next plunge. Yes I am 'giving'....but how much sacrificing will I do.   


The next day we discussed some ideas for the return of this old man, wanting to build relationship with him. We threw out ideas of offering a hot shower, doing his laundry with some extra clothes on hand, perhaps making him a warm breakfast.  We realize opening our home to one man may lead to many other curious bypassers stopping by....but I cannot limit my love based on who might take advantage of me, or how it might overwhelm me. That's in God's hands. The old man has not yet returned the past few nights. His pillow and 'blanket' remain in the closet by the front door just in case.... and my heart is now more prepared....to give abundantly, not out of my 'extras' but instead out of my 'best'... Another lesson in the process of being learned :)

Healing

The past few weeks have been focused on health and rest as I have still been struggling with some infection. After getting a fever (chills,sweats, body aches) I returned to the doctor in the capitol city and she confirmed that there was still an infection. I began some medications but had to wait a few days for final test results. She recommended being admitted to the hospital in my home town so they can administer IV antibiotics and shots numerous times a day. The hospital room was private, much to my relief and Manasa was able to stay overnight with me. They provided food three times a day, typically Mongolian stew, so Manasa brought food from home. I have to admit that the mind takes a battle when it comes to not feeling well and one night I was overwhelmed with frustrations (the medical care being less than my expectation - skipping medications, not taking any vitals, cleanliness standards etc) and began asking the dreaded questions "What am I doing here?". I think any missionary can appreciate that more than once your tasks, responsibilities, or uncontrollable situations will leave you sitting at Jesus feet, again asking for His word as to why you are called to such a challenging position. Looking out my window at the natives going about their daily routines, I was reminded that I may not be called to lead a conference or initiate a revival but I was called to love. And that Love I can do...even when frustrated, sick, wishing for hot water etc...I can still love. I am now home in my comfortable apartment and can't say enough about how my husband has provided and taken care of me. We are still keeping on eye on my health, knowing in the back of our minds that an earlier trip to the USA might be in order. I have one set of pills to finish this week. I know my fever is gone (and assuming the infection also) but am still not feeling myself. I've attached a picture Manasa took at the hospital (even though I wasn't a big fan of his photography at the time).... Always reminded that God is the ultimate Healer and we are only deceived into thinking we have control with our medications, testings and medical knowledge. Yes, He uses those things for His good but we are always dependant on the One who made us.  A big thank you for those who have been praying during this time!

Home sweet home , move number TWO

....so after consulting with our Mongolian teacher she recommended we move again, to an apartment we had looked at previously, a bit further. The owners are subleasing the apartment to raise money for an upcoming wedding. After moving in we realized they left some of their furniture so it makes for a tight squeeze but we are not complaining. They are apparently working on the hot water pipe for the building so bucket showers have been my friend. We are thankful for a working toilet and you can imagine how happy I am to get the kitchen up and running and a fridge with food in it again (after going with no electricity). Our neighborhood is by a major market so we do not have to walk far to catch a taxi. On our way there we pass by an opening in the ground leading to the hot water pipes, where a couple homeless people live. We are still working on unpacking boxes, connecting internet etc but feel much more settled, again glad for the support of the YWAM boys. I am especially thankful for my Manasa. We found out a 130pm on Thursday that we were going to move, the house was ready again by 4pm and the boys had us moved in by 730pm. We then woke up early the next morning to head to the capital city, Ulaanbaator , to check in with a Korean doctor (a three hour road trip). Attached are a few more moving pictures.... whew

MOVING day number ONE

So with our adventures in moving.... we have been staying with missionary from Brazil, Ivania, in her studio apartment (yes three people sleeping in one room!) and have been grateful for her accommodation. Finally moved in on Sunday during a dust storm! I stayed home after just having kidney pain, and some of the young men from YWAM helped Manasa to move his things into the new apartment. When we returned the next day there was no electricity, but we didn't mind and enjoyed the candlelight dinners and worship time with guitar at night (nothing else to do!). However we received news from our landlord three days later that she was increasing the pay by fifty dollars a month and asking for the year's worth in rent (we chose this apartment because we live on monthly donations and would not be able to have that amount of money in one time). We decided to not unpack everything as we waited to hear back from her..... (more in next post)

Gallbladder too?

So after my symptoms seemed to continue I took a trip to the capital city to see a Korean doctor, who spoke English. She was helpful and information, showing me the high white blood cells, glucose etc She also took a look at the ultrasound and said not only was kidney inflammation but also the gallbladder is bend, or curved. It could have been showing symptoms for a while. A new test showed the infection was gone but continued a round of medicine for a week and also added medicine for gallbladder. I am feeling quite better, with a few changes in diet (no coffee, chocolate, fatty/fried food and limit eggs) The hardest is to limit the eggs, as I am a big fan of that type of protein and finding lean meats here is difficult. So I'm thankful for all the healing prayers, and am on the mend. I'm expecting to check in with American doctors if/when I am in the USA again for visit. Attached is a picture of me 'recuperating' after a painful weekend.

New friends

  A group of us got together to wish our Brazilian friend, Ivania, a farewell as she ventures off to another part of Mongolia. It was quite the international night, having made friends through Mongolian classes, the neighborhood etc. I giggled as I watched the Filipino and Australian chat in Tagalog, while the Brazilian and Korean laughed through a mixture of Mongolian and charades and the American practiced her Chinese from Chinese classes with a lady from China. What fun! Essentially, the human heart is to connect and communicate- even if it takes work, concentration and trial-and-error. Hopeful to get together with these ladies again soon!

KIDNEY stones?

Wednesday night I woke up with sharp pain in my side and back. After numerous trips to the bathroom and tossing and turning I realized this wasn't a pain I had experienced before, not digestive, not ovaries etc.. I woke my husband up and he prayed for me in Fijian then went back to sleep. By 6am I was hit with nausea and asked to be taken to the hospital. That began by adventure with the medical system and my American assumptions as to how it should work. By seven we had stopped at three different doors on the hospital only to be asked to come back at 830. We went to another more private clinic a 830 to get bloodwork and urine test done only to find out results would not be available until 2 pm. Concern for appendicitis led our teacher to take us to another private doctor in old darhan where i was able to quickly get an ultrasound. That doctor said I was okay but my kidney was large. The doctor poked and prodded and agreed it must be the kidney and said to wait until the test results. Finally getting the results back and a trip back to the doctor came the vague diagnosis of ~bad kidneys~and an emphasis that it was from the cold and to stay warm in Mongolia. Of course with translation I just clarified that they were putting me on an antibiotic. In a world where a typical American has a good basis of how the body system works, viral vs bacterial infections, blood counts etc it was difficult for me to be confident in my diagnosis. But i remember who the Ultimate Doctor is, and that is my God who knows my ins and outs much better than I. I believe it is kidney infection or stones and have begun the antibiotics (by pills since my eyes got big when i saw the size of the needles and the process for mixing the medicine in vials before it goes into the needle, which my kind husband would have to give me every 8 hours!). If things have not improved greatly in the next two days we will take a trip to the capital city where they have more choices including a Korean hospital and an International hospital. At the moment I am not feeling the sharp pains very often, just a dull pain and was able to sleep. Thanking God already for His healing and believe the prayer support around the world is the source of that healing process ...

Not unusual

Walked into the toilet marked with the woman with the skirt to find a buddhist monk (male) using it...awkward right? That wasn´t the unusual part....the unusual part is that I did NOT find it unusual at the time....lol  (oh and of course no toilet paper)

Place to lay our head

No place to lay our head...
We had a beautiful and quick trip back to the city of \Darhan from Erdenet only to find no room available at the YWAM base. A quick call gave us room with our Brazilian friend Ivania, even though she only has a studio apartment. Her hospitality has saved us as it´s taken us this full week to find an apartment. The new trend is for owners to want the entire years rent pay and living by faith, on a month to month basis, means we cannot reach that need. God opened doors for us and last minute (ivania moves tomorrow) we found a one bedroom apartment for reasonible rent, and will do 3 month rents. Its a bit further from our Mongolian school than we would have liked but we look forward to nice walks until it gets too cold. God provides in His timing and we move tomorrow! As my husband recently put on his facebook page :

"A scribe came and said to Him, 'Teacher, I will follow You wherever You go.'" [Matt 8:19-20] and Jesus replied - "Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head."

Mickey Mouse and kissing the puppy

Today I was able to skype with my niece, April and family. My sister and brother-in-law are spending the weekend with my parents (happy birthday dad!) and since my sister does not have Internet at home, this was my chance to skype with them. My beautiful sister is pregnant with twins due soon and it brings joy to my heart to see her healthy and ready to be a mommy again. Little April is just about 2 years old and her jabbering sounds so grown up. Skyping was fun , seeing her confused look turn into a little grin as we begin to talk. I suppose that would be confusing that the 'tv' is talking back and calling her by name. But she seemed to catch on and we had fun giving kisses to her toy puppy and baby, and singing Micky Mouse. She's getting so grown up! Being on the missionary field, it's one thing that often gets stressed in my prayers : that God would guard my family while I'm away. In reality, even if I was living in the same house, His hands are much better protection and provision than mine could be! Being far away however, not even a phone call away at times, brings it into a different perspective. To get back home would easily take me up to 30 hours of travel time, and that's only if a plane was leaving that same day. On another hand, its somewhat to think that while I'm sleeping, the family back home is living, and while they sleep its my turn to pray and cover the day. I'm so very grateful for my church family back home because you know that they will fill the voids, if there are any, just as we would for their families. Missing my family back home today but thankful for the opportunities that the Internet provides for me to stay connected! Imagine the missionaries years ago, where a letter would take months to arrive. Hoping to get back to American around the holiday season to reconnect, make memories, and meet the new arrivals :)

Those who understand the heavenly vision of what His house is called to be will, like Abraham, leave everything to wander in places where they do not even know where they’re going, but do know what they’re looking for—the city that God is building. ~Rick Joyner. 

Thinking about this quote and the different places God has called me. Some have the misconception that missionary life is wonderful because of all the travels and sightseeing. While we absolutely appreciate the beauty of where God takes us, that is not the motivation (for most of us!). The inner unrest at knowing that we are the Kingdom of God, and that there are still more daughters and sons of God out there in the vast diversity of the nations, unaware of their inheritance and the beauty of the love of God  - THAT is what we pursue, and THAT heart longing is what gets us out of bed in the morning. Mongolia is known as the "Land of Blue Sky"....but underneath that sky is my call - the gorgeous owners of this land who live in the darkness of shamanism (worshiping many different gods/spirits, using trances and crafts to touch the supernatural) or who aimlessly practice the traditions of Buddhism...those who are still in need of our Creator God to save them. They motivate me.  

And tomorrow...it may be another nation and another country...but ALWAYS it is my neighbor.